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If I only but touch His cloak

This artwork depicts the sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick. (CNS illustration/CrisAnne Fernandez)

Earlier this year, for the third time in four years, I experienced a series of life-threatening medical incidents where I hemorrhaged massive amounts of blood. If not for modern medicine – and the glory and grace of God – you could say that I was dying each time. In fact, after the scourging, exsanguination is what probably ultimately caused Jesus’ death, together with diminished ability to breath while on the Cross.

If you ever face a serious medical situation where you are at risk of death or serious impairment, be sure to do this one thing, which is more important than anything else: Call a priest. If you are physically and mentally able, make a good sacramental Confession, but in either event, ask to receive a sacramental Anointing, then receive Holy Communion if you are medically allowed to take anything by mouth.

If things go south and your condition worsens and you die – which is always a possibility – you want to be prepared because, believe it or not, earthly death is not the worst possible outcome. An Anointing will heal you in the best way possible – with the healing of grace that unites you in loving communion with your Creator, the Lord, in case you are soon to go to Him. And, in some cases, an Anointing will give you the grace of restoring you to physical and medical health.

In the Jewish tradition, blood is deemed to be life itself, the life force, so to speak. In biology too, of course. Hence, each time I experienced a substantial bleed, life was literally draining out of me. As I got weaker, my life ebbing out of me, there were some thoughts and prayers that filled my mind and spirit.

I was conscious of being right there with Jesus in the Garden. Like Him, the cup before me terrified me…and at the same time, it did not. Please let it pass by. Please. But I also recalled what else Jesus said: Your will be done. And during the times of active bleeding, when I called out to the nurses to get me quickly down to CT so they could scan and locate the source, I realized that I was not only in the Garden, I was not only at the foot of the Cross, but was up there with Jesus on the Cross. This could be it, I thought. So, I accepted the concept of redemptive suffering, where you unite your sufferings to Christ and take His Passion upon yourself. Yes, death was getting closer, but in the moment, I was not afraid. Why? Because I knew that the Lord was with me and I with Him.

My main prayer, however, was simply this, repeated as a mantra over and over and over: If I only but touch His cloak; If I only but touch His cloak; If I only but touch His cloak, as I imagined myself stretching out my hand toward Jesus. I had the unshakable faith that the Lord would hear me and stop it if it be His will. The woman with a hemorrhage in the Gospels is not named (Matthew 9:20-22; Mark 5:25-34; Luke 8:43-48), but I know her. And she knows me, and she helped me by her intercession. As He did for her, Jesus did for me and gave me healing.

During my first hospitalization, I experienced many episodes of active bleeding, but they never could find the source. Yet, once the nearest parish priest came to visit and I received the Sacrament of Anointing, the bleeding just stopped. I had touched the hem of His garment. True, six months later, God in His providence allowed the hemorrhaging to recur, but this time the grace went to my doctors and nurses and they found the site and corrected it.

Four years later, I did not expect hemorrhaging again, but it happened. It was determined to be in the same location as before and, eventually, surgical intervention was the only life-saving option. Through it all, however, although the bleeding was much more extensive this time, again, I was not afraid. My mantra returned – If I only but touch His cloak – but mostly I was at peace because a priest came and gave me my second sacramental Anointing. Thus, whatever happened, my soul was good to go.

In most cases, it will not be you who is in need of an Anointing, but a family member. When that time comes, when the last days or hours have arrived, do not hesitate to call for a priest for an Anointing and apostolic pardon. That is what we did when the dying process set in with a close family member a few years ago. Beyond it being of the greatest good for him, it was also of enormous relief for us in our mourning process because we knew that when he passed, he was with God.

With an anointing before death, we can trust in the promises of Christ that the departed is now with the Father in heaven. We should still pray for him or her, of course, but we do so with assurance of hope fulfilled. And besides, this is what our faith is all about. This is our main mission as Christian faithful – to be reconciled and united in communion with God who is Love and help others to be. So, when the time comes, call for the priest and touch His cloak. God be praised.

(Mark Rothe is an employee of the Archdiocese of Washington’s Pastoral Center.)



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