As a parent of a child with special needs, it’s hard not to sometimes get overwhelmed by the “won’t get to,” elements of adult life that seem inevitable.
My son attends public school in an LFI (Learning for Independence) program. There are moments when because you know the other mile markers, it’s hard. His younger sister takes physics and Latin at her school. His older brothers and sisters are in college or have finished and have gone on to jobs and the other realities of adult life. So, God reminds me with Paul, that life lived lovingly, is the good fight, the race we’re supposed to be running.
Seventeen years ago, we worried about my youngest son’s heart even before he was born. Two months after he drew his first breath, surgeons from Children’s Hospital in Washington, D.C., performed open heart surgery. His heart was remade to have four chambers. I think I held my breath the whole four-plus hours of surgery. Yesterday, the cross-country teams of his and a competing high school, stood cheering him on as he finished the course. They sang him “Happy Birthday” and handed out cupcakes. I thought his heart would burst with joy, I know mine did.
His coaches organized the sing along and cupcakes, but the kids also willingly sang for him, and some of the other team ran behind him in the final stretch, cheering him on.
Yesterday, I saw roughly 70- plus students cheer for someone half of them didn’t know, for finishing a race last. Paul has Down syndrome, which means he has one extra chromosome, and that moreness defines his physical reality with extra obstacles to everyday life. However, his joyful embracing of the struggle, is a witness to how all of us are to respond to the obstacles we face.
Grace veiled but alive in the world, manifests in little things done out of kindness. When we choose mercy over anger, charity over judgment, when we forgive, when we forebear, when we serve, when we love. God is love, and our job as disciples, is to bring it to the suffering world. The world needs more. The world needs the extra that we can offer, the Christ we carry.
Having gone to cross-country meets for him and some of his older siblings, I know what happened on Sept. 17 at the finish line is part of that cross-country running culture. The parents and the teammates cheer each other on, and the goal is to best yourself and no one else. What matters is showing up, persisting, step after step because each step matters.
In the spiritual life, we are to be doing the same, cheering each other on, and persisting, even when the feelings aren’t there, because the process is one of obedience of the will. Each step matters, and we have to pour our heart into it, and understand crossing the finish line, running the good race, is the goal. It is also the purpose, to root for everyone to finish and finish strong.
(Sherry Antonetti, the author of “The Book of Helen,” is a freelancer and a Catholic blogger @Patheos/Chocolate for Your Brain!)
